HAPPY FATHER'S DAY... DAD

I have tried, unsuccessfully, for the last three years to write a Father's Day column about my Dad.  It's very difficult to write about a man that is the most perfect human being that I have ever had the privilege of knowing.

In my effort to condense the life of a novel worthy man who raised six kids with my mother, I began thinking about the greatest lessons I have learned from him.

I remember when I was five years old and there was only one brownie left over from dinner and we chose to split it.  My dad took the knife and cut the brownie into two unequal parts. He allowed me to take the bigger half and told me " When there is only one thing to share, always give the other person the bigger half." 

Such a simple lesson for a five year old, but one that has followed me throughout life.  As I continued to grow up, the brownies in my life became bigger and the lesson more profound.  To share of oneself is truly greater than anything you would receive in return.

My first job, at the age of 14, was working for my dad.  I was in charge of filing invoices and putting together bulk mailings for his company.  Day after day, I would seal envelopes and put every stamp on perfectly straight!  I didn't need to go to college to earn a degree in Business; I learned all I needed to know about business from him. 

While quietly working in his office, I listened to him on the phone with customers.  He was always polite and well spoken.  He knew who paid the bills- the customers.  I was continually amazed at the effort put forth to do whatever he could to please them.  Honesty, kindness and respect are the three R's at Bob's School of Business. 

My dad isn't just a course in Business Administration, he's a whole campus!  My mom, along with my sister's and I,  have pleaded with him for years to offer a course through Community Ed entitled  ‘Bob School'.  My dad can fix, build, take apart, and create anything and everything!  He is pure mechanical genius!   He knows how to break instructions down to the smallest level so even us girls could understand. 

When I was trying to learn to drive a stick shift, I just couldn't figure it out.  It was my dad that explained to me exactly what was happening in the engine and why you need to shift.

"Duh! Why didn't anyone tell me that before?"  He taught me that when you need to explain something to someone; pretend they are from another planet and break it down until you meet a point of understanding. 

"Hello, I'm Bob Schutz" he would say as he offered himself with a perfectly comfortable grip of a handshake.  When we were kids, he was always on top of the six of us telling us to sit up straight, don't slouch when you walk, look the other person in the eyes, speak clearly and use good manners.  I have come to realize that the more you do that, the more confident you are in yourself.  It really works!  The everyday effort towards good manners and social civility are just as important as physical exercise. 

"If you don't have anything nice to say, don't talk at all."  If I had a nickel for every time I heard that one.....  My dad has always known that words have power.  He should also be awarded a tremendously huge, solid gold trophy for never swearing.  I'm not making this up- my dad has never uttered a swear word in his life!  Just ask my mom! 

With this lesson, I have to admit to failure.  But every day is a new day with a clean slate and I can do better.  I don't swear a lot and I do know the difference between a verb and an adjective.  At least when I swear, I'm using the words in their correct context.  This really doesn't make it any better, does it. 

I'm sure you're reading this thinking "Yeah, but he's gotta have some flaws."  Yes he does, he can't cook.  Unless you call making popcorn - cooking!  Today isn't about flaws, it's about honor and respect for the dad in your life and the lessons you learned through him that made you a better person. Every one of us comes up short at one time or another in our life of parenting.  But we all have the opportunity, everyday, to wipe the slate clean and do better.

And now for a personal note to my Dad: Thank you for teaching me that being a good person takes very little effort. It's a day to day, moment to moment - choice.  Thank you for being a remarkable example of kindness and respect for others.  Thank you for sharing your life with me.

Happy Father's Day to all the Dads out there that are doing their best to teach their kids how to become tremendously great adults!

I love you Dad,

Linda

Linda Schutz

June 2007